its.moo
Sunday, January 02, 2005
confusion
how do you know when a girl is interested? as many of you know, i have had problems in the past recognizing the difference between someone being nice, open to friendship, and someone that might be interested. unfortunately i've had such little experience with dealing with women, that the slightest kindness can be easily misinterpreted.
unfortunately this has caused somewhat of a barrier in at least one of my friendships that i cannot seem to get past. i do not want to see that happen again.
i keep getting signals, and to me they seem obvious what they are pointing to. but how do i know? i do not want to screw this up again. :( how do you know? anyone?
unfortunately this has caused somewhat of a barrier in at least one of my friendships that i cannot seem to get past. i do not want to see that happen again.
i keep getting signals, and to me they seem obvious what they are pointing to. but how do i know? i do not want to screw this up again. :( how do you know? anyone?
posted by Kevin at 1/02/2005 11:41:00 PM
7 Comments:
Open doors for her, buy her meals and treats, take her to the movies, find out her birthday and send her roses, don't talk about other females (past or present) if you can get away with it, REMEMBER her interests, make her personal things, write her a letter, call her often, have confidence, don't make fun of her, have fun, have some confidence, don't talk about yourself unless she asks, try things she wants you to try, don't be negative, talk about what you LIKE not dislike, be positive, say nice things about her (after all you like her - so its not fake!)
if she gives you a lot of friction after being uber nice, FUCK HER!!!! :D j/k
I debated on whether or not to post this little rant, but here it goes.
I have been the "nice guy" on most occasions. After all, I am a nice guy, so it just seems obvious to take that route. I think that I have gained some knowledege on how this works. So, take it with a grain of salt. If you disagree, it makes no difference to me.
In my experience, being "uber nice" as the above poster suggested will not get you very far. Why? It's simple. Even if you are a nice guy at heart, most of the "uber nice" attitude stems from a lack of confidence that the guy feels needs to be compensated by being a saint. Now, there are exceptions to this rule. What are your intentions with this woman? Is she your soul mate? Do you just want to fuck her and move on to the next one? All this comes into play in deciding on how to properly play the game. Make no mistake, it is a game.
I know what you may be thinking - If we are meant for each other, if she is my soul mate, then there shouldn't be a need for games. I used to think the same thing. It's bullshit. You barely know this girl. You have no idea what she is truly like. There is no way to even know if she is compatible with you and your life. Therefore, the game must still be played - at least at the start. The bottom line is, this is how it works. You can play the game and do your best, or you can resent it and maybe get lucky one day.
Now, with that being said, playing the game is quite simple. Make yourself intriguing and attractive to the opposite sex. Being "uber nice" won't work in this game. It shows weakness, desperation, and lack of confidence. Now, does that mean you have to be an asshole? Perish the thought, but you CANNOT be desperate and needy. Which is what the "nice guy" vibe portrays. Women want men who are confident, interesting, and not afraid to go after what they want.
Be confident in yourself, and BE yourself. Otherwise you are just wasting time. Don't be "uber nice" just to be nice. Women can see right through that and you end up looking pathetic. Be a man. Go after her. If she doesn't accept, move on. That's life.
Again, this is my opinion and is almost certainly flawed in this description of my theories, but I gave you the short version. Disagree if you want to, this is how I see it.
Sad, sad, sad...much to learn.
I assumed there would be disagreement. ;) Good luck Kevin, do what feels right.
If it's wet, it's ok.
Well.. that was lewd... ;)
...and once again, we move on. :( *sigh*
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